


Deceit's Last Resort

by denixvames



Series: Fanfic Sanders Sides [16]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Adventure, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:54:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26891734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/denixvames/pseuds/denixvames
Summary: Virgil doesn't want to exist anymore. Remus and Deceit try to move on from the past but can never forget. Patton, Logan, and Roman are in the crossfire of this situation. And Sleep is nowhere to be found. While this is all happening, Thomas believes he could have done better at the wedding. (Inspired/Based off/by Putting Others - First Selfishness vs. Selflessness Redux)
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: Fanfic Sanders Sides [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1961851
Kudos: 3





	1. Pain Never Dies

My name is Virgil. Ever since I was created, I've wanted to kill myself. I use to make Thomas's life miserable. But the light sides were always there to help him. And I soon became friends with them. It was something that I never thought would happen. All I ever knew was pain. 

"Virgil!"

And now, here I am. Stuck remembering the abuse that I went through before I had met Roman and the others. I try to be a better being. I try to forget what the dark sides did to me. It seems like that will never happen. Not while my world keeps reminding me of what I went through. Of what I did.

"Virgil! Are you ok? Can you hear me?"

All I want is for everything to stop.

"Oh thank god! You're awake!" He slowly opened his eyes. Logan and Patton were standing near him while Roman was knelt beside him. "Wha….What happened?" "We were playing ball and you just passed out." "Have you been keeping yourself stable?" ,said Logan. "You're not hurt, are you?" ,said Patton. Virgil had a hard time looking at him. He could barely look at the others. They all had the same face like Remus and Deceit. Like himself. He grit his teeth. He clenched his fists. Digging into the grass. He quickly stood. "I'm fine." Roman reached out. "Are you sure? Do you want to-?" "I said I'm fine!"

All three were shocked by his sudden shout. Virgil took a step back. He pulled his hood over his head. He ran to the forest. "Wait!" ,said Roman. But he ignored him. Running past the trees, they all became dead and crooked at his presence. He sat at a tree. His knees were against his chest as he silently cried. A dark aura surrounded him. Roman and the others had followed him. "Virgil! Where are you?" "We can talk about this kiddo!" Logan said, "Don't make any rash decisions!" Rash decisions? Do they think I'm going to screw everything up again? I can't blame them. I always ruin everything. A dark portal opened below him. The three sides finally found him. "No! Don't!" ,said Roman. Virgil sunk into the portal. Roman threw himself at it but the portal had already closed.

Virgil hugged his knees. His eyes were closed. He became lost in darkness. Floating there in misery. So many thoughts swam through his head. An unbearable amount of regrets haunted him. The dark portal opened to the dark world. Letting him in. He stood. He looked around. "I don't deserve to live anywhere. I shouldn't even exist." The dark being in the forest began to whisper to him. Trying to convince him. Virgil pressed his hands against his head. With hot tears, he shouted, "Would you shut up?! You don't hurt me anymore! I don't need you to tell me what I am!" He lowered his gaze to the dead grass. He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I already do that to myself." The dark side remained silent. Merely watching this curious situation unfold.

Remus walked over. "This world is off limits, you know?" Virgil glared at him. He pointed. "This is all your fault! You and Deceit!" "What? What did I do?" "You know what you did! You made me bring Thomas paranoid thoughts! Made him have a hard time growing up! He couldn't even find himself until he saw me as an enemy!" "He didn't even knew you existed!" "But he knew what I was! He knew what anxiety was!" One of Remus's eyes twitched. "Don't forget that you were the one who made us!" "I wasn't trying to! The Darkness built up his pain for too long!" Virgil fell to his knees. He hugged himself. "All of that pain...I thought if I didn't get rid of it then something bad would happen to Thomas. But I realize now that he would have been fine. The only one who would have been gone was me."

"Virgil, you shouldn't think like that." Remus walked over. "What you're saying isn't even true. Thomas would have gotten hurt if you hadn't made us." A portal opened. Deceit and Sleep ran over. Another portal had Logan, Roman, and Patton running out of it. "Virgil!" ,said Roman. Virgil stood. He ignored his prince. Focused only on Deceit. "Why? Why did I have to suffer for twenty three years?" "I thought we moved past this." ,said Deceit. "I tried to! I tried to forgive you but I couldn't!" The grass under Virgil's feet turned into dirt. Virgil clenched his fists. More tears burst out of his eyes. "I never wanted to feel this way! Every second of my existence is miserable! I wish I was never created!" His dark aura radiated throughout the world.

Every light side fell to their knees. A darkness surrounded their eyes. Deceit's eyes widen. He felt something sinister surged through his body. He curled his lips into a smile. Loving these new feelings. Remus twitched uncontrollably. He suddenly laughed. Imagining so many ways to kill the beings. He pulled out a knife from his back. Sleep merely stood there. Unphased by the darkness that Virgil had created. However, his heart broke when he witness Deceit's change. "I've been through enough to know real pain." A portal opened behind him. He choked on his words. "But I can't do this anymore." He entered the portal. Never looking back.

Virgil opened a portal under the light sides. Making them fall in. They returned to their own worlds which became rooms. The dark world quickly divided itself into rooms as well. Replicating Thomas's living room. Remus, Deceit, and the other dark side had been placed in their own rooms. Virgil looked around his room. Everything was black and purple. He sat at a corner of the room. "It's better this way. I won't exist for anyone. They'll forget about me. Maybe I'll finally sleep forever."


	2. His Reflection

Spiders crawled out of the cracks of his room. They created their cobwebs. Soon, they reached Virgil. Covering him with cobwebs. The spiders scurried away when yellow snakes slithered to him. He didn't care to move. Letting the snakes wrap themselves over his legs and arms. One of the snakes bit into his neck. Releasing its venom. His vision faded. He blinked rapidly. His eyes closed. 

Deceit appeared in his room. He smirked. "You fool. Did you really think that you could be one of them? The light sides?" He chuckled. "You'll always belong to me. You will never stop being a dark side." He leaned in. Whispering, he said, "And no one will ever love you." He snapped his fingers. The snakes released their hold on Virgil. Slithering to their owner who let them crawl into his mouth. He swallowed them whole. Saving them for when he needed their service for some other time. He tapped his shoe against the floor. Virgil fell through a dark portal which led him back to the darkness. Stuck in slumber, he floated there. Believing he had stopped existing.

Remus sat naked on the couch. Enjoying the sight of scattered organs in his own room. He couldn't stop laughing but he loved it. "Oh look at what I've done! It's magnificent!" Deceit appeared. "Deceit! My snakey bitch! How you doing?" He cleared his throat. Adjusting his gloves. "Put your clothes on. We need to talk." "Oh c'mon!" Remus appeared behind him. His hands were on his shoulders. He licked his ear. "Don't you wanna fuck?" Deceit cringed at the touch of saliva. "Maybe some other time." He snapped his fingers. Remus's clothes appeared on his body. Remus gave a pouty face. "Poopy pants!" Deceit rolled his eyes. He turned around. Facing him. Remus's smile widen further when he saw his immediate smile.

"I've got Virgil in the abyss. He won't be bothering us anytime soon." Remus opened his mouth unbearably wide. A booming scream echoed in the room. Blood dripped from his eyes. Deceit smacked him. Remus cracked his neck as he turned his head. "What are you complaining about this time?" He repeatedly stomped his foot on the floor. "I wanted to kill him! I was going to gut him like a pig! Take out his insides and play with them!" He giggled. Deceit held his chin in thought. "Tell you what? I'll let you do that once you help me get rid of the light sides." "Getting rid them means...?" Deceit snickered. "Yes, we're killing them." Remus jumped for joy. He clapped his hands. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I swear I'll make them want to be put out of their misery!"

"Yeah yeah...Just don't ruin my plan." Remus raised his hand in a U.S. soldier's salute. "Reporting for duty, Captain Daddy!" Deceit flinched. "Don't call me that." "Sergeant Daddy? Private Daddy?" "No daddies!" "No daddies?" "Yes!" He hissed. Sticking his split tongue out. Remus grabbed him. Kissing him rough and hard. Deceit smiled. "Sometimes you're not so bad." He held his hand. "Now, let's go see a prince you know all too well." Remus glared. His grip on Deceit's hand tightened. He growled. "That selfish bastard!"

Roman was posing in front of a body mirror. He smiled at his handsome features. Pleased that he was made as perfection. He brushed his hair. He reached for the powder to make his face radiant under any light. A knife hit the powder. Knocking it off the fancy drawer that Roman had built with his ideas. He gasped at the sight of Remus's reflection in the mirror. Remus was glaring. He held a knife. "Hello dear brother." From the reflection, he grabbed him by his neck. He lifted him off the floor. "I'm done with your shit!" He stepped out of the mirror. Roman struggled to get out of his hold. He tried to push his hand off. "For years, you've locked me away! Keeping me from Thomas because I am a being with flaws! You didn't want me to ruin his perfection!"

He slammed him against the wall. "Well, you know what? I think he could use a few improvements!" "Who are you?" His eyes widen. He read his face. He could tell he was being truthful. Blood formed under his eyes. The room darkened. He grinded on his teeth. His piercing glare sent chills down his brother's spine. "You abandoned me!" He stabbed his arm. Roman cried out. Blood dripped from the wound. Staining his sleeve. He stared at Remus. A memory surged within his mind. Breaking the barrier that had kept him from the memories. The battles he had with Remus were all coming together. And what he had done soon came to his realization.

Roman threw himself on him. He held him close and tight. Remus's eyes widen. He didn't expect that hug. "R-Roman?" "I'm sorry for everything. I care about you....brother."

Roman frowned. "I'm sorry." "Wha-?" He laughed. "You're sorry?" He continued to laugh as tears dripped from his eyes. He soon turned that smile upside down. He dropped the bloody knife and let go of Roman. Laughter had become sobbing. He turned away. Falling to his knees. "Why did you abandon me? What did I do wrong?" He looked at his blood stained hands. His dark aura died down. The blood around his eyes had disappeared. "What am I doing? All I wanted was to be like you. Now, look at what I am." Roman knelt. He laid a hand on his shoulder. He smiled. Remus looked at him. "You look just fine to me. Individuality can be weird. Not following my style? That's the most creative thing I've ever seen."

The memories suddenly rushed into Remus's head. "Oh my god! Roman, you're hurt!" He reached out. Roman raised his hand. Blocking his. "It's ok." "But you're bleeding!" "I deserve it, Remus. You and I both know that." Remus clutched his chest. "I get it now. I know why you left me in the dark world. I just make things worse." Roman took his hand. "I abandoned you because I use to think I was perfect. That I was the only being that Thomas needed. I was selfish." He brought his hand on his wound. "But I accepted you because I need you. We all do." He kissed his forehead. "Because I love you." Remus's hand glowed. A blinding light filled the room. Once it faded, Roman's wound was a scar.

Remus glanced at his hand. "I can heal you?!" "See? You're a perfect imperfect being. Flaws make you the prince in your story." He rubbed his tears off as he chuckled. "Oh brother! Sometimes you don't make any sense." Roman laughed with him. "I really don't, do I?"

Deceit appeared. His six hands were clasped together. He held a cocky smile. "Hello Roman."


	3. Positive Separation

"Deceit!" "Thank you Remus for weakening his state of mind." "Please think back, Deceit! He's your friend and so are the other light sides!" Deceit sighed. "Looks like our dark leader didn't take enough of your innocence." "What?" "When you first showed up, you were naïve and...happy. The dark leader found you playing in your brother's room with Roman of course. He saw potential in the darkness you had. It was sleeping. Dormant. However, the dark leader showed up in the room." He appeared in front of him. He cupped his chin. Tilting his head. Their lips were close. He grinned. "He gave your brother a deal. Give Remus to me and I can make you the center of attention." 

He turned to Roman. "I'm sure you can guess what was his answer." "That's not how it really went." ,said Remus. "Not exactly." "Are you talking back to me?" The snake-like being looked at him. "Deceit, you need to understand something." A portal opened. "We're not the bad guys anymore." He shoved him into the portal.

Deceit came out of the portal. Landing on the floor. Patton had been playing with Thomas's childhood plushies. Creating voices for each one as he created a story for them. He was laying on his stomach on the couch. He glanced at Deceit. "Hey! Do you want to play?" With a big smile, he skipped over to him. Deceit hissed. "You vile thing! So innocent and pure! I can change that!" He tackled him to the floor. His other hands punched his face. Over and over. Until blood was dripping. Until the bruises came. Patton screamed bloody murder. Sobbing as he shouted, "Why are you hurting me? Did I do something wrong?" Deceit froze. He recalled a scenario like this. A foggy memory that he wasn't so sure was real or not.

Sleep caressed his cheek. Admiring the side of his face which had scales. His yellow eye was beautiful to him. Deceit felt something strange.

"Sleep..." Deceit's extra arms slinked back into his body. Standing, his bowler hat fell off. He clutched his head. "No! This is all wrong! I'm supposed to bring order! I'm supposed to turn you into dark sides!" Patton forced himself up. He walked to him. "What are you doing? Get away from me! I'm the one you should fear!" Deceit backed against the window's curtains. "Sto-" Patton placed a hand on his chest. "I can tell that you miss him. He misses you but he's also afraid. It seems that the darkness poisons you once in a while. And when that happens, you hurt your friends. But mostly, you hurt him." Deceit covered his mouth. He became wide eyed. Tears fell. "I...I'm abusive." Patton placed his hat on his head. "And I remembered too." He watched him sink into the floor. Deceit had left his room. Appearing in Thomas's living room.

"That's why I can't go back. There's only bad memories." ,said Sleep who had been talking about his feelings to Thomas on the couch. Thomas frowned. He pat his leg. "I'm sorry that this happened to you. Hopefully, this will all be over." Sleep dropped his iced coffee. "Deceit?" Deceit smiled. "It's me. I'm ok now." Sleep threw himself in his arms. Deceit spun him around. His cape flapped in the wind. He set him on the floor. Their foreheads pressed against each others. Sleep chuckled. "It's so good to see you." Thomas walked over. "Sleep, you were just telling me about this. You can't do it again. You'll only hurt him and yourself. You two need to understand each other. Talk this out."

Deceit sighed. "He's right. Our relationship has been nothing but fights and apologies. At first, it was love but I never notice until now..." He brushed a tear off Sleep's cheek. "I never wanted to hurt you. You know that wasn't really me whenever I fought you." Sleep placed his hand over his. "I know. But I think we both get that this can't go on forever." "Of course. I don't want you to feel trapped. Things are different now between us. I just hope you won't see me any differently after this." "Are you kidding me?" Sleep cupped his face. "I will always love you. No matter what, you're still a good side to me." Deceit's lips quivered. He swallowed his tears and smiled. "Thank you, Sleep." They turned at the sound of crying to find Thomas with tears. He rubbed his eyes. He sniffled. "Sorry, I get so emotional with these moments."

"It's ok." ,said Sleep. He hugged Deceit. "This is for the best of us. I hope you can find a way to control the darkness." "I hope so too. I'll never forget the moments of you helping me deal with my inner demons." Deceit kissed his forehead. It reminded Sleep of Patton. Sleep took a step back to Thomas. "Goodbye." "Take care." Deceit sunk to the floor.


	4. Confessing Frustration

Remus appeared in Deceit's room. Finding the dark side to be sitting on one of the steps of the staircase. His head hung low. "Something tells me it didn't turn out the way you wished it did." "Oh! Hey Remus." The said being sat next to him. Deceit shook his head. "Just the complete opposite. It was what me and Sleep needed." Remus gripped his pants. "I'll never be able to forgive him. My brother." He grit his teeth. "I still have the urge to kill him. I'm trying to suppress that down. I don't know if it's ever going to leave me." 

Deceit chuckled. "Do you know how many times I wanted to lie to them? It was such a habit that sometimes I'd catch myself before I could even say a lie. Trust me. That feeling won't leave for a while. I'm trying to work on that too." Remus held his hand. "You've still got me." Deceit smiled. "I always did." Remus returned the expression. He leaned in. His eyes closed as his lips parted. Deceit stood. Taking his hand out of his grasp. "Remus!" He stepped off the staircase. Clenching his fists. "What we had wasn't right." "We were different back then." "That doesn't make it ok to be together. I mean, what if I hurt you? What if I do something even worse to you?" Remus laughed. "Oh you couldn't do that. I've already been damaged enough." Deceit grimaced.

Remus frowned. He walked over. "I didn't mean it like that. I should be more careful with the way I say things. I've gotten so use to accepting horrible situations. Mainly because most of those were made by my hand. I shouldn't have pushed your boundaries like that. I'm sorry." Deceit pulled one of his gloves off. He stared at the scales on his hand which were also on his arm. "I don't know when I'm going to move on from what I've done in the past but I'll tell you this." He placed his glove back on. He looked at Remus. "Once I'm fine, we can talk further about...things." "Really?" He held a small smile. "I promise."

Roman appeared. "Deceit! Remus! We need to save Virgil! He's trapped in the darkness!" "He doesn't need to be 'saved.'" ,said Deceit. "Huh? What are you talking about? Of course he does!" "Look Roman. You recall when he had a mental breakdown? Well, that breakdown caused his powers to malfunction. He made us all forget our memories. He even changed our worlds into rooms. Except for Patton's. It was pretty much close to the same but now he can't go upstairs like us." "And what does that have to do with him being in the darkness?" "Don't you remember what he said?"

"I never wanted to feel this way! Every second of my existence is miserable! I wish I was never created!"

"He didn't want to exist anymore." ,said Roman. "Exactly. Virgil allowed himself to be connected with the darkness. It's his new room." "That still doesn't make it right!" He placed his hand right where his heart was. "I won't abandon someone that I love! I can't do that again!" "This is what he wanted!" "Maybe what he wants isn't always the best for him!" Deceit sighed. "It's going to be hard but you have to accept the facts. There's nothing that you can do for him anymore. You did all you could." Roman's face went red. A fiery rage was in his death glare. "You did this to him!" "What?" "Roman!" ,said Remus. Roman ignored his plea. Continuing with his rant. "You made him believe he was worthless! You poisoned him with your words! You fooled him into thinking that you cared about him! That you loved him! And when he was vulnerable, you hurt him!"

Anger burned within Deceit's chest. "You think I wanted to do any of that to him?! I thought I was doing the right thing! I didn't exactly grow up with rainbows and fairy tales!" "But you enjoyed it! You smiled every time he was in misery! You used him! And because of that, you made him feel alone!" Roman grabbed him by his shirt. "Stop it! You're going to hurt him!" Remus tried to pull them apart from each other. Roman became easily irritated. "Stay out of this!" He punched him. Deceit took a step back. Roman gasped. He covered his mouth. Remus pressed his hand against his cheek. He looked at Roman in disbelief. Blood dripped from his nose. "You...You hit me..."

"Remus, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-!" "I tried to be better! I wanted to be better! I thought I could be but no! You had to hurt me again! After everything that I did for you!" A knife appeared in Remus's hand. He stomped. Leaving a large crack on the floor. "I'm tired of these games!" He jabbed at Roman who dodged every attempt. The knife hit the wall behind him. Remus suddenly dropped his weapon. He fell to his knees. "I'm exhausted of everything I had. Existing like this is painful enough." Roman held him close as he sobbed. Deceit punched a wall. Leaving a fist sized hole. "I did this to you. This is my fault. I should have done better to help once the darkness left you." "We can't start blaming each other. All we can do now is rescue Virgil." ,said Roman.

"I can open the portal to the darkness." Deceit lowered his head. His voice was filled with shame. "I was the one who trapped him there. I know how to fix this." Roman helped Remus stand. "Once you open it, I'll throw myself in the darkness and get him out of there." "It's dangerous to be there even if you're a dark side. It's more crazy when you're a light side. The darkness will try to consume you. You can't let it get to you." Roman nodded. "I know what I'm in for. I've always been ready to put my existence on the line for Virgil and everybody else. No matter what, I'll never stop loving him even if he'll hate me for this."

Deceit stepped forward. "Then get ready." He raised his hand. The dark portal opened. Roman stared into the abyss. "Deceit." He turned. "Everything will be ok when we get back." "I hope you're right." He gave him a quick smile before jumping in.


	5. Reuniting Lovers

Deceit looked at his shaking hands. "S-Stop! Just stop it!" Remus reached out. "Deceit? Is everything alright?" "Kill him!" Deceit's hat fell as he pushed him. "Get away from me!" "Make him bleed! Make them all bleed!" "Whatever you're dealing with, I can help you!" "You're weak! Too weak to do it!" Deceit fell to his knees. He screamed. The room began to shake. Cracks in the walls emerged. A yellow glow appeared at every opening. "You can fight this! Whatever it is you're going through, I can help!" ,said Remus. "IT! WAS! ME!" Deceit punched the floor. The two dark sides fell through. Finding themselves in Thomas's living room. Logan, Sleep, and Patton had unwillingly appeared. Surrounding him. Remus was a part of the audience. 

"Virgil! Can you hear me?!" Roman was floating in the darkness. This void of emptiness seemed to be never ending. A sudden faint purple glow appeared in his view. He flew closer to it until it became much clear. "Virgil!" He pulled him in. Holding him in his arms. "Virgil, it's me! Roman! Please wake up! We need you!" He stared only at a lifeless shell of his former boyfriend. Tears fell from his hopeless eyes. His voice was breaking. "You were wrong about yourself. You are a necessity for all of us. You helped us when no one else had a damn clue on how to help Thomas. I know that I haven't been the best supporter for him. And I haven't done enough for you. But you make a difference for us. For Thomas. For me."

He leaned in. Pressing his lips against his. Holding on for what felt like an eternity before letting go. Virgil's eyes opened. Glowing purple.

Deceit stood. He looked at them. "It's my fault! I did this! I caused all of this!" "You can't blame yourself for everything that's happened to us." ,said Patton. "But this is because I abused all of you! Worst of all, I hurt the one side that I loved the most. I made everyone feel worthless. I did the same to Virgil. Instead of protecting him, I let Remus hurt him just as much as I did. And Remus wouldn't have done any of the horrible things he did had it not been for me." "I won't deny that the actions you had taken before were frightening but you've changed now. You have tried to make up for those mistakes. It's clear to me that you have made excellent progress. Therefore, I forgive you" ,said Logan.

Deceit's eyes widen. "I forgive you too!" ,said Patton who gave him a surprise hug. "Me too." ,said Remus who hugged him too. Logan nodded and hugged him. Deceit glanced at Sleep. "Of course I forgive you." Sleep hugged him. Roman and Virgil appeared. "They're here!" ,said Patton. Hand in hand, both sides walked up to him. "We forgive you." They hugged him. "I heard your pain." ,said Thomas. Everyone turned to him. He walked downstairs. "There is no one to blame but myself. I wasn't there for any of you when you felt hurt. I thought the dark sides were horrible versions of me. Parts of me that I didn't want to ever become or see." He placed a hand on Deceit's shoulder. "But I realized a long time ago that I was wrong."

Deceit smiled as he rubbed a tear off. "I'll never understand your forgiveness but I think I owe you all the truth." Thomas took a step back as Deceit pulled his gloves off. He dropped them. Once they touched the floor, the gloves vanished. The scales on his hands were not there. "My name...." All of the sides and Thomas stared at him with anticipation.

"Is Janus."

They surprised him with a group hug. Joyous tears had fallen from his half yellow and half brown eyes. With a smile he said, "You guys are ridiculous, you know that?"


End file.
